As I sit on the plane right now part of me gets what’s going on and part of me has no clue. As the wheels pulled up off of the ground in Indianapolis and I realized that the place I made fun of and disliked so much 2.5 years ago that has subsequently become my home that I love so much is not going to be my home anymore. A slight part of me realizes that I I’m not getting on a plane to go on a nice vacation like I am accustomed to but that I am leaving everything that I know to enter the great unknown, where I don’t know the language, culture, food, people, or how to shower! As we got higher into the sky for the first time in about 6 years I thought to myself, “I just want my mommy.” My heart pleaded out to not leave this nice life I know and love where everyone I love and care about is within 4 hours driving distance to move to another country...
Today hasn’t been easy. I am scared. I’m scared of the uncomfortable and unknown but then I remember that when I woke up today I declared to God (as I try to everyday) that today I will die to myself so I may be alive in him. I know that this is his will for me and it is good and perfect and will be beautiful. I know he is looking down on me right now and smiling at my obedience and desire. I’m scared but I serve a good God who has shown his unending faithfulness to me throughout this process. Who has provided for me in ways that I never even imagined or asked for... why would I serve anyone else or listen to my own fears when there is someone who knows me and what I need better than I do? I am listening and I am following, it’s the only thing that makes sense.
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